The Marginalian · People & society

Enlightened Enchantment: A Guide to True Love

Love is a powerful enchantment, but it can be true or false. True enchantment, or enlightened enchantment, is a surprise that magnifies our connection to life, while false enchantment stems from self-deception and cultural myths.

Anthropologist Patrick Curry, in "Art and Enchantment: How Wonder Works," offers a guide to distinguishing true from false enchantment, viewing love and art as ways to participate in life's creative processes.

Curry defines enchantment as something that happens to you, not something you do, contrasting it with will and projection. It is fundamentally relational, a wonder at another, which can be a person, animal, plant, or even an idea.

Enchantment thrives on complementarity and difference, occurring in encounters across a gap. This bridges boundaries, leading to a connection that transcends the human realm.

William James suggested that the person deeply in love sees another more truly than others do. Enchantment, therefore, feels more real than ordinary reality or dreams.

Enchantment is wild and unbiddable, a reminder of our chance existence. While we may feel fated in love, this feeling reflects our hunger for meaning.

Experiences of enchantment are intensely meaningful and fateful. True enchantment, like unpossessive love, involves delight that exceeds itself, akin to a musician's relationship with music.

True enchantment is an ongoing encounter with the mystery of the other, which cannot be possessed but only held in wonder, as exemplified by musicians and long-term relationships.

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